Scam Interviews In Nigeria - Personal GNLD Job Interview Scam Experience

Story story?!

Graduation from school basically launches you out into the world. To conquer & dominate or vice-versa. You have no idea what's waiting for you outside. The labour market is looking at you and shaking its head while you are strutting around like a Boss.

 In my mind , Lagos was the hub for jobs and 'conquering the world'. Abi? First thing is to look for a job so as not to be utterly useless like the 'P' in Psychology. You can't come to Facebook or Instagram and be slaying as a full time job nah?

Are your village people shaking your table?

Every avenue I saw to apply for a job, I applied. Whether I meet the minimum criteria o, or I don't have experience oo, I applied. Nobody should tell me anything, As a Nigerian, you try everything, you don't know which one will click biko!

I kept trying like that until one day I saw this mouth-watering offer. Six figure salary & great benefits like you hit gold and diamond in your sleep. As a sharp Igbo boy, I saw it was just pasted 2 hours ago from the time I saw it. You know the next thing nah, apply fiam! CV sent with such lightening speed that was faster that a bullet. Shebi I've sent CV, The next thing is to get a call or text for interview abi?

First day passed, nothing.

Second day passed, nothing..

Third day, I had totally forgotten about it when a message entered my Nokia torchlight phone. Pim Pim! "CV Vetted & Approved, you have been shortlisted for an interview with ............on so so & so so day at so so & so so address."

Ehn! Osi na o gini? Did I just see interview? My six-figure prospective job interview. Mama I made it oo. My village people have been put to shame. You see ehn, in my mind, I had already a bought Range Rover Autobiography, built a house in Lekki, was sending money home and married all my Facebook Gehvrens. I was just thinking of how I will go and massacre them in the interview with my big big grammer. They will know that somebody came. Even Dokinta, was putting salt and Agino-motor to the whole thing of how they must take me. "Well, why won't they take you, you're all shades of awesome". Thunder will faya that guy sha.

Interview day came, I dressed up looking dapper, ready to slay with my dressing and to slay the interview panel. One would think I was into insurance and I was looking to ask someone "Do you have insurance?" Over-flowing with a tremendous amount of confidence, I set out to the address of the place. I made sure that the buses I entered were clean so that my 'slay' will not spoil. In my small mind, this was it, like this was the job mehn!

Me: Na the place be this? Number 8?

Keke Guy: Oga na him..

Me: Okay no wahala

I had arrived at the address given by the text but, just but sha.......

Got in and saw a few other people in a place that looked like a large sitting room. It was fine enough. I took my seat in all my 'pepper dem' glory. Not quite long, a young guy with a slightly protruded belly came and it was learnt that he wanted to address. In my mind, I'm like "Okay, Unku do quick lemme go and ace this interview, I don't got time"...

He started the speech. I wasn't listening at first because because I felt it was just protocol until this speech started entering the 6th minute. Before you know it, 10 minutes was gone. "Bia, won't you finish?", I asked him, telepathically. Maybe he just didn't hear me.

I then became attentive, listened well and starting hearing stories of how someone somewhere became a millionaire, how someone started driving a Lexus 570 SUV and how we were all going to be taught how to make money. The next thing I heard was " Don't think of it as hard or tasking, In GNLD, we.....". I blanked out after that. It was like as if someone slapped me and I was just hearing "wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin" in my ear drum. If I'm not exaggerating, I felt I could see my village people dancing one corner somewhere around there. Chai, my village people have won me in this round sha. I was thinking that I was going there to capture the diamond and gold of the labour industry and these ones are telling me GNLD.

I picked myself up, removed the earpiece from my pocket, fixed it in my phone & blasted Davido's Fia Fia to the maximum volume. Pulled my shirt out from its tucked in position, and walked out...
Got into the bus and started warning myself sharp sharp, "If you like, send your CV to them again since you don't want to have sense again". I was still scolding myself when Dokinta called me

Me: Hello

Dokinta: Bobo how far? You don finish dem, I trust you nah..

Me: Nnaa, Okwa ndi GNLD ooo, Na GNLD people. Which kind nonsense be this sef.......

Village People 1 - Duke 1

Dem don equalize.

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